How amorous students trap their tutors


Published on 01/02/2009

By Crazy Monday Correspondent

When teachers get into relationships with their students, society is usually quick to apportion blame.

The teacher is depicted as a slobbering he-goat, a wolf in sheep’s clothing, an agent of the devil, a shepherd who turns on his flock.

But one thing that the rest of us do not appreciate is that teachers too have their stories to tell. And in a surprising number of cases they are victims of well-choreographed machinations by scheming amorous students.

A casual chat with some of them reveals the great temptations that these men and women of the chalk are subjected to by the ‘little devils’, who also happen to be their students.

From high schools to colleges, students routinely conjure up ingenious ways to mellow and eventually conquer the hearts of their teachers.

Female students in high schools, for example, are notorious for penning love notes and hiding them in exercise books intended to be marked by the targeted teacher.

As the teacher peruses the book, she or he will stumble upon a nicely scripted love poem or just a note expressing feelings of love and perhaps requesting for a meeting.

Woe unto the teacher should he or she dismiss these notes as the innocent products of adolescence. While strict teachers are able to resist this, the feebler ones fall for it hook, line and sinker.

Otieno, a lecturer at a middle level public college in Nairobi who has been the target of scheming female students, says some bold students will do anything to achieve their aims.

He says every time he entered one of the classes last year, two well-dressed and pretty girls would always come in a few minutes after him “wearing some nice smelling perfumes”. They always made a point of passing near him even if there was no seat available nearby. They left in their trail sweet fragrances that lingered long after they had sat.

laying the trap

Initially, he would pretend not to notice them. One day, one of the girls walked up to him in the middle of the lesson and requested permission to go out. At some point, she ‘accidentally’ rubbed his shoulder and left the fragrance on him. With that, the mighty fell and he later looked for her and they hooked up.

Otieno, the intellectual that he is, is yet to comprehend how he finally gave in after resisting for so long. And you guessed right…he’s blaming it on the devil.

Some cheeky students will go all the way to find where the teacher lives and then follow them there. They will then seek for an opportune moment to ‘accidentally’ bump into the teacher.

A tutor in Nairobi one day met his student at the entrance to the estate where he lives. She claimed to have come to visit a friend in the estate but had missed her and didn’t have money for bus fare. She was also feeling dizzy, she claimed, and asked if he would allow her into his house to rest. Being gentleman, he gave her a room to rest, since he lives in the two bed-roomed house alone.

During the night, he heard a knock on his bedroom door and when he opened, she was there in her birthday suit. The tutor says he can’t remember what came over him; he came to his senses much later when they were in bed together. And there she confessed that she had been trying hard to nail him down and that everything had been planned to the letter.

Easily available

After class, some students will pretend that they have questions or academic problems they would like their teachers to assist them with. They will seek the assistance privately offering to make themselves available anywhere the teacher desires.

While the teacher is busy explaining the issue at hand, the student will be busy trying to pass her own message across. This might involve looking suggestively at the teacher’s eyes, crossing and uncrossing her legs of moving too close to him. If not dealt with in good time, both the teacher and the student might find themselves entangled in a web of intimacy.

Technology

Other students employ technology to lure their prey. They will seek out the target teacher’s mobile phone number and effectively use it to get him or her. They will call and drop hints of love while maintaining anonymity until the teacher decides to play ball. They will praise the teacher’s attire for the day, the way they talk and tell them how much they admire them, as teachers and as members of the opposite sex.

And if they know the teacher’s favourite football team, the students will always call to congratulate or console them depending on their team’s performance.

Depending on how the teacher initially reacts, they will use the opportunity to pass their message across.

Others will usually send steamy messages to their targets in the dead of the night, especially if the teacher is not married. They will do this continually until they succeed. They will try to sweet talk the teachers and make them ‘see the light’.

Some students use Internet as their ‘tool of trade’. The IT savvy ones will search for their teachers’ profiles from the now popular social sites like Face Book. And disguising their identity, they will initiate communication with them and at some point arrange for meetings. It’s only during the meeting that the teacher will come to know that he/she has been duped. Whether out of shame or embarrassment, the teacher will go ahead and become friends with the student. The shy ones will use the email to get in touch with the teacher.

In a twist of irony, some students are even able to double deal the teachers who are supposed to be their mentors. It is common for some students to be lovers with two teachers in the same school. It is usually war when the men and women of chalk find out that they have been taken for a ride.

Joseph, a Form Three student in Nairobi, talks about the tricks he employs to win over his teachers. He says that just from the initial appearance, he is able to tell whether or not a given female teacher is ‘approachable’. So, any time their class gets a new female teacher, he becomes very active in class in an effort to catch her eye. He will be the one to wipe the board, collect books, carry books for the teacher and generally be the first to offer services whenever needed. When he is sure that he is in her good books, he makes his move.

His rate of success has been so high he has been expelled from three schools. The charges have included having illicit affairs with female teachers. Last year, he was expelled from a school in Western Province after the principal caught him in a compromising position with his wife, who also happened to be a teacher at the school.

Human frailties

As one teacher asks, who will stand up and declare that he or she will be strong enough to withstand such choreographed temptations?

He says that no teacher ever plans to be romantically involved with students, but many are ‘beaten emotionally’ into compromise.

Could this be the reason why many parents are dead against their children becoming teachers? The call to handle professionally boys and girls blooming in their adolescence and coming to terms with their sexuality is a daunting one. No wonder many men and women have failed towards this end.

And as Reverend Michael Burry puts it, “If one of us could ascend to the heavenly realm and for a few hours accompany the divine on His daily rounds, he would see below millions of his fellow humans busily hurling themselves into the passions, sports, and action of those around him. But if our observer had the power and omniscience of the Lord, he would also feel and sense, pulsing through and vibrating from every one of us, a desperate and unending plea, ‘Notice me! I want to be known, admired, and loved by the whole world!’

“And it is this, this innate and yet glorious weakness, this dependence of ours on each other, that makes some of us heroes and fools at the same time.”

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