Let’s openly talk about sex to demystify the act and its cost

Njoki Karuoya

I was at Holy Family Basilica on Sunday to celebrate the launch of a pontifical mission for children. Dressed in colourful outfits and waving paper flags that represented their new mission, it was great to see the shining joy on their faces as they sang, danced and served the afternoon mass.

When they stood up to declare their vows before God and the entire congregation, some adults were so moved they shed a few tears. From that Sunday henceforth, the purpose of the young ones (all under age 14) will be to help each other grow into good Catholics.

My five-year-old daughter demanded to know why she was not part of the group. That caught me off guard because, despite the weekly announcements, I didn’t really believe she was old enough to be part of such a powerful movement. I thought she would not understand the teachings and, to be more honest, I thought she would be a handful for the teachers. I was proved wrong when I saw a few pre-schoolers dance down the aisle.

Sweet vices

This is where sometimes we as parents go wrong and I am sure I’m not alone. We imagine our children are too fragile to face a few world realities and understand how they affect them. As I register my daughter as a PMC this Saturday, I hope it will be the beginning of a long journey where she and her new friends grow to become good Christians for life and guarantee us good behaviour for decades.

Hopefully, she will keep off all the harmful things that life sometimes seduces impressionable young people with. Such vices cloaked as sweetness include drugs, sexual promiscuity, crime, alcohol, cigarettes and sloth.

Most religious institutions have different programmes that cater for the needs of young people as they grow up from toddler stage to adult maturity. The overall aim is to ensure each church member finds a group that suits his or her age and preferences.

For young people, such groupings are particularly important as they provide guidance and direction in spiritual matters and life skills. I know this for a fact because I went through this system in my time. Sadly, not all young people have access to, or have enrolled into such wholesome programmes.

If national statistics are to be believed, the youth form majority of Kenyans infected with HIV, Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases. They are the ones churning out hundreds of pornographic videos and dancing nude in clubs.

Seeking guidance

Young people are acting incredibly stupid when it comes to sex, especially under the influence of alcohol or misguided peers who hold the power of thought over others.

Girls are dropping out from school because they are pregnant or some guy has convinced them to dump education for come-we-stay arrangements. The affliction is especially serious in rural areas where girls’ schools are closing down because all students have dropped out.

Whether we like it or not, the youth are an endangered species and unless we all intervene, they may just wipe themselves out. This is the reason why the Government and its partners have embarked on aggressive campaigns to market contraceptives to young people to protect them from unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections, including HIV.

The message sent out last week Saturday as the World Contraception Day was marked globally targetted teenagers and urged them to seek guidance from people they trust on matters to do with sex. Parents, teachers, church leaders and community leaders need to wake up to the fact that sex today is a very dangerous sport and large scale interventions need to be adopted starting from home.

The only way young people can stem the tide towards sexual immorality and death is if they have all the information at hand to enable them make informed choices.

It is important that as children grow, they are talked to about the physical changes in their bodies and the resultant mental, emotional, social and psychological transformations. This process of learning has to continue until they are sexually mature, which should be around the age of 21.

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